Have I talked to you about this already? About how I want to open a restaurant where everything, the chairs, the salt and pepper shakers, the plates, the silverware, the napkin, and the VERY FOOD ITSELF is 8/7 scale? Thereby making you feel and look slightly smaller than usual, like you’re magically petite? Thereby freeing you to order more cake?

But wait, this might backfire if your date is one of those short men who wishes he were taller and wider. Oh! Maybe his plate and silverware and food could be slightly SMALLER, giving him a little boost? And the table itself could be narrower at his end and flare slightly at your end, giving dinner the kind of forced-perspective of a stage?

You would have to make super sure that you sat at the right end, though.